When a friend asked me to go see “Honey Don’t!” with her at the Northbrook Court AMC, I said yes immediately. Why? She described it as a comedy about a lesbian private investigator played by Margaret Qualley, and also featuring Aubrey Plaza and Chris Evans. Should I have questioned further? Probably, but I heard three names I knew and the words “private investigator.” It sounded good enough to me.
I didn’t know what I was in for.
The first error in my friend’s description is that the film is a dark comedy, specifically a neo-noir dark comedy. This means that almost every scene in “Honey Don’t!” is either sexually explicit or a gruesome murder scene. The comedic aspect comes from the idea that lesbian sex is taboo, or comes from just how disgustingly creative the characters’ methods of violence are. In one case, a character is stabbed in the throat with a fork, while another character’s face is burned with a kettle. So no, this was not what I would call a lighthearted comedy.
But this is not the main issue with “Honey Don’t!” Its mediocrity lies in the fact that its plot goes nowhere. The film follows a private investigator named Honey (Margaret Qualley) who discovers the dirty secrets of a local church. She teams up with a police officer (Aubrey Plaza) to expose how Reverend Drew (Chris Evans) is preying on vulnerable female congregation members.
With an interesting premise, a cast of talented actors, and well-loved director Ethan Coen, “Honey Don’t!” has so much potential. Yet somehow, I left the theater confused and dissatisfied.
The film starts with the suspicious death of a member of the church who calls Honey the day before her death. Through connections with the police department, and after interrogating Reverend Drew, Honey somehow pieces together that the church is involved in an illegal drug trade.
I understood some aspects of the story through scenes between characters involved in the drug trade, but it was unclear as to why some characters were involved. The beginning of the movie features so many murder scenes and depictions of violence, but it provides no context for the situation.
Essentially, this film has no point. I was gasping at every murder scene and big reveal, and obsessed with Honey’s outfits, but when the end came, I had so many questions.
Without approaching spoiler territory, I will say that the end is extremely underwhelming. There are several scenes during which it seems like the film is wrapping up, but it just keeps going, as if Coen is trying to trick the audience. Somehow, when the end finally comes, it feels abrupt. Because the film passed several possible end points, I had assumed that if it was still going, it was because there would be some resolution or exciting twist.
But no. There is no cliffhanger, shock, or happily-ever-after. There’s no “aha” moment for viewers. The film ends with a mundane scene featuring Honey going about her work day as if the entire plot had never happened at all.
I sighed once the movie was done. I turned to my friend and said, “That’s it? Was that the end?” I keep asking myself what the point of this film is. It could’ve been a commentary on religion and the drug trade, or a feminist film portraying an unstoppable protagonist, but Coen dropped the ball. I’m almost tempted to remake the movie myself because I’m so disappointed by this waste of a good idea and talented actors. So, if you were looking forward to watching “Honey Don’t!” this weekend, I strongly recommend saving your money and optimism.