Monday Apr. 8 marked the beginning of New Trier’s annual “Paranoia” competition, a game in which teams of five compete against each other to eliminate the opposition as quickly as possible using Nerf guns. Aside from an occasional grace period and certain safe zones, very few rules are in place; effectively, it is a no holds barred competition where only the fittest, most cunning, and most dedicated teams survive. The prize consists of not only complete and total bragging rights, but also a hefty sum of money that is estimated to be around $5,000.
Paranoia has long been established as the culminating event for each graduating class; after four grueling years of work and very little play, Paranoia is a sort of release, where friends can come together for a common cause and direct their pent up energies toward a completely harmless goal—killing people with foam nerf bullets. It is a community building activity in which anyone can participate, and it is an event that graduated seniors speak positively of when they reflect on their time at New Trier.
But despite almost universal support of Paranoia’s existence among the student body, the game is not without its critics. Many, due to a series of nearly violent encounters involving the competition, think that Paranoia ought to stop.
Take what happened in Gurnee on April 9, for instance. A group of seniors, playing their school’s version of Paranoia, entered a restaurant—with ski masks over their face and water guns resembling real firearms in their hands— with the goal of eliminating their target. A man dining at the restaurant, who happened to be a concealed carry holder, mistook the kids for a real threat, perhaps staging a robbery or an inciting active shooter incident. In response, he pulled out a real firearm and aimed it at the seniors. The situation eventually deescalated as the true motives of the seniors were revealed, but obviously, things could have gone south very quickly.
A man dining at the restaurant, who happened to be a concealed carry holder, mistook the kids for a real threat, perhaps staging a robbery or an inciting active shooter incident. In response, he pulled out a real firearm and aimed it at the seniors.
But forget Gurnee. One does not need to look any further than our very own New Trier Township to see the very present dangers of Paranoia. Last year, according to The Record North Shore, the Northfield Police Department received a call “About a masked individual dressed in camouflage and armed with a gun advancing toward the home of Northfield Police Chief William Lustig.” Police responded quickly, arriving on the scene before “[pulling] and [aiming] their firearms at the camouflaged individual.” The individual was soon unmasked, revealing a 17-year-old boy, but again, this just serves as another example of how quickly an innocent game can turn dangerous.
These incidents beg the question: Do the very concrete risks of paranoia outweigh the potential benefits?
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It is clear that Paranoia and other senior assassin games pose a clear and present danger to student safety. If either one of the aforementioned situations went just a little bit differently, it is very possible that real lives could have been lost. But, so long as players follow one central rule, the game can be played safely, and live on: Don’t be stupid.
The game and all that it entails is perfectly safe so long as people do not make blatantly stupid decisions. Do not run into restaurants with a ski mask over your face. Do not camouflage yourself near the police chief’s house. Play the game reasonably and sensibly, and no guns will be put in your face, and no risk of death will present itself.
I do not think that this rule is very hard to follow, and despite its simplicity, everything that can go wrong with Paranoia can be averted if people abide by it. A game that involves Nerf guns should not be inherently dangerous, it is only the poor decisions made by the students that place the game in jeopardy. Remove those from the equation, and it is hard to argue that the game cannot be played successfully, without placing kids in harm’s way.
There are very few things that bring the student body together like Paranoia does. Not everyone enjoys attending football games, watching student theater productions, or participating in clubs. But this is something that, almost objectively, everyone enjoys. This is something in which everyone can take part. This is something that connects us all together. So, let us commit to making sure the game continues, and let us vow to not be complete idiots.