Living with others is hard. As we advance to adulthood, we acquire certain tastes that don’t match our parents. Bathroom time is no longer ten minutes, but, rather, an inconsistent 30, depending on the weather.
As college approaches, it is likely that your stomach is filling with butterflies.
I’ll be blunt: your new roommate will leave hair in the sink and so will you. It’s likely that he or she will smell bad too, because perhaps they’ve decided that showering is overrated.
And your dorm will consistently smell like Chipotle. Unlike showering, over-priced Mexican food it is not overrated.
Obviously, there are many different types of roommates and it’s likely you won’t have the same one for the entirety of your college days. Below is a list of 6 different types of ‘mates you might happen upon.
Snoring Steven: Be prepared to sleep adjacent to someone who sings a slight hum in the middle of the night. According to the National Sleep Foundation, snoring affects 90 million adults. If you’re paired with a snorer, like Steven, for example, a few simple ways to fall asleep (without attempting to suffocate them) include plugging in some headphones, using a non-habit forming prescription drug, or falling asleep before them.
Just note that holding Steven’s nose until he stops will not do the trick.
Smoker Sally: Maybe you partake in the act or maybe you don’t. Either way, coming home to a small, congested space that reeks is not cool. Plus, if Sally’s choice of smoke is weed, the smell is probably mixed with a failed attempt at nachos. Now, your domain is not a place you can sleep or study.
Pete the Preacher: This may not be on every floor, but you’re bound to run into a group of kids that live and breathe for their church. There’s nothing wrong with this form of expression, but hearing Bible chants at 2am is not how you want to spend your all nighters.
Before you know it, Pete has joined them and is now conducting meetings in your room. All I’d say is don’t drink the koolaid.
Neat freak Nate: You’ve just left your parents and are excited to be able to shoot your clothes at the laundry basket, shout “KOBE,” miss terribly, and not have to pick it up. Unfortunately, you’ve just moved in with your mom.
Nate has already made five trips to The Container Store prior to arriving and has now moved on to the label maker. If you think that you can get away with leaving a clump of toothpaste in the sink, you’re wrong.
Stealing Stephanie: Stephanie is the type of girl who is sweet until you get to know her. She will never miss an opportunity to compliment you on what you’re wearing and immediately after ask to “borrow” it.
She’s also the type of girlfriend that collects past boyfriends’ sweatshirts, hats, and other memorabilia. She’ll steal your makeup, even though you have different complexions, and will claim she “owes you one.”
Ironically, Stephanie is majoring in criminal psychology with a minor in communications.
Messy Marley: This is Neat Nate’s worst nightmare. Messy Marley will always argue she’s an “organized mess.” We can’t blame her; she’s been this way all her life.
She was the kid who spilled chocolate milk on her math homework, accidently tied her shoes together, and would consistently exit the bathroom with toilet paper stuck to the bottom of her right sneaker, which is, by the way, on her left foot. Messy Marley is studying creative writing, for obvious reasons.
Is there such a thing as the “perfect” roommate? Everyone has their quirks so whether you know your roommate, have lived with others before, or are new to the entire experience, just remember to be flexible.
The worst type of person is an uptight person. Wait until you’re 50, that’s when all rights are reserved to be anal and cranky. Otherwise, go with the flow and be the roommate you’d want to be around.